A Knight’s Tale (146: Big Clean Days)

My penultimate day in Sigoules during February 2013 was what David had termed a ‘big clean’ day.  It is the mandatory preparation for the next visitors.  Washing and ironing was the least of it, because that had been done throughout my stay.

I worked my way down from the top.  First the sweeping and hoovering, including the removal of any of the previous year’s lingering cobwebs.  Then the dusting, although there was very little of that.  Beds needed to be prepared, and the porcelain attended to.  The final task was swabbing down tiles and staircases.

When I had the luxury of more than one day I could be more thorough.  I first dealt with those rooms I either had not used or would not be using again before I left.

No-one this time had used the attic rooms accessed by the upper staircase.  They therefore didn’t need much attention.  Attic rooms 2 and 3 each lead off room 1.  What this room loses in privacy it gains in the presence of two spacious walk-in locked cupboards.  I think it was Elizabeth who pointed out that it would be possible to get two more bedrooms out of them.  The exposed original stone wall is interlaced with huge wooden beams from the dismantled barges that could only navigate one way up the Dordogne.  Only two entrance beams were a danger to heads.  These, as in the doorway of room 2, had warning flags pinned to them.  Otherwise a stepladder is required to reach the roof.  The chest of drawers in room 3 occupies a niche which  terminates below head height.

When Michael and Heidi  and their family first came here it took Oliver about thirty seconds to get up to the top and bag the bed in room 1.  The girls were quite happy with his choice, although Alice soon rigged up a truckle bed beside her brother.  The cupboard in room 3 had reminded her of a scary story.

After the attic came first floor bedroom 2 which, although large, needed a minimal amount of furniture as it had a built-in wardrobe.

I descended to the downstairs WC and shower-room and gave it a good once-over. Finally, I swept and swabbed down the upper staircase and the utility corridor leading to the shower room.  The only hazard in this area was the front wheel of Oliver’s outgrown mountain bike that hangs from the ceiling.

I spent the next morning hoovering and tidying the rest of the rooms.

Following Elizabeth’s sensible suggestion, I changed my bedding in the main bedroom just for the last night.  This obviated the need for trying to get it washed, dried, and ironed on the morning of departure.  Possible in the summer, but certainly not during that time.

As I had only eaten two meals at home on that trip, the kitchen didn’t need too much attention.

The sitting room and entrance hall have had the heaviest usage.  The defunct washing machine and ancient ironing board in the hall are waiting for a kind friend with wheels to help me take them to the municipal dump.

I did not venture into the cellar that lies beneath a trapdoor in the hall.  At the bottom of a narrow winding set of stone steps the entrance required me to bend double, and I was not often up for that.  This opens out into a spacious area Mike had kitted out as a workroom.  It would then have ben used to store winter fuel, had I got round to buying any.  When the Kindreds first lived here, a friend fell through the open trapdoor and broke his leg. This prompted Mike to build one of his inventive constructions.  He fashioned a retractable balustrade to surround the entrance to the nether regions when open; rigged up a wall-mounted pulley such as would hold an elephant; and equipped this with a powerful webbing strip to be attached to one of the iron rings from which the trapdoor can, by slowly cranking the winch, be raised.  The instructions for doing this are pasted, in French and in English, on the wall beside it.  Mike is not a games inventor for nothing.  I kept the balustrade hooked in place on the wall and covered the tiled trapdoor with a carpet.  Jackie’s sunhat concealed the machinery.

The bathroom would have a thorough clean in the morning; and, in order to allow time for drying overnight, the ground floor tiles and lower stairs would be washed before I went to bed.  My mobile phone lies on the ledge behind the loo because that is the only place where I could sometimes receive a signal.  It beat keeping a stack of joke books beside the seat.

The last three weeks had been so wet that I hadn’t been able thoroughly to sweep the tiles in the courtyard garden, although there was a brief window of warm sun that afternoon enabling me to sit outside for a while and even get a king sized duvet cover iron-dry.  The birds were joyful.  Maybe the chicken would finish the sweeping.

A Knight’s Tale (142: The Crash And The Flood)

Until the end of 2008, although I could not afford to buy another house in London, the interest on my money from the Newark house was earning c£1,000 per month. Suddenly this almost disappeared. The global financial crash had happened. I had paid a deposit on the house in Sigoules back in August, and, of course, the French solicitors unnecessarily delayed proceedings so that completion was not reached until mid-December.

I had a choice. I could cut my losses and accept the loss of my £10,000, or I could continue with the purchase and hope for the best. I also felt obliged to the friends from whom I was buying. I carried on regardless.

In December 2008, just a week after completion of my purchase of No. 6 rue Saint Jacques, S.W.France was hit by the greatest storm in living memory.  The gales were even worse than those that had buffeted the U.K. in October 1987.  The consequence was that Maggie had had to telephone me to tell me that my recently acquired house had been flooded.  I had not even had time to take possession. The cellar was full of water and there were several inches of it in the ground floor.  Multiple disaster had struck.  The gales had thrust water under the French doors at the back, and the local underground stream had strayed into the cellar, completely filling it.  Because of a three day power cut across the entire region the auxiliary generator installed for just this eventuality failed to function and had to be replaced.  The trapdoor into the cellar was swollen and had to be forced, breaking some of the tiles laid over it.  To make matters worse the inferior plastic piping distributing water throughout the house had sprung a leak and burst.  Now I have a copper system which cost a pretty penny.  Maggie and Mike had managed to get emergency help to pump the place out, and obviously I had to come over to organise repair work.  The house was freezing, damp, and full of soggy mats and plumbers.  I stayed with Maggie and Mike.

The English representative of the Insurance Company managed to wriggle out of responsibility for the consequences of the tempest, and I was advised to pay the plumber in advance. Much against my better judgement I stumped up. The plumber never finished the making good and it took 18 months for Mike to recover my keys from him.

Around The House, Day 2

I spent the morning hoovering and tidying the rest of the rooms.

Main bedroom 2.13Following Elizabeth’s sensible suggestion, I changed my bedding in the main bedroom just for the last night.  This obviates the need for trying to get it washed, dried, and ironed on the morning of departure.  Possible in the summer, but certainly not at the moment.

Kitchen 2.13As I’ve only eaten two meals at home on this trip, the kitchen didn’t need too much attention.

Sitting room 2.13The sitting room and entrance hall have had the heaviest usage.  Hall 2.13The defunct washing machine and ancient ironing board in the hall are waiting for a kind friend with wheels to help me take them to the municipal dump.

I did not venture into the cellar that lies beneath a trapdoor in the hall.  At the bottom of a narrow winding set of stone steps the entrance requires me to bend double, and I’m not often up for that.  This opens out into a spacious area Mike had kitted out as a workroom.  It would now be used to store winter fuel, had I got round to buying any.  When the Kindreds first lived here, a friend fell through the open trapdoor and broke his leg. Trapdoor winch 2.13 This prompted Mike to build one of his inventive constructions.  He fashioned a retractable balustrade to surround the entrance to the nether regions when open; rigged up a wall-mounted pulley such as would hold an elephant; and equipped this with a powerful webbing strip to be attached to one of the iron rings from which the trapdoor can, by slowly cranking the winch, be raised.  The instructions for doing this are pasted, in French and in English, on the wall beside it.  Mike is not a games inventor for nothing.  I keep the balustrade hooked in place on the wall and cover the tiled trapdoor with a carpet.  Jackie’s sunhat conceals the machinery.

Bathroom 2.13Lower stairs 2.13

The bathroom will have a thorough clean in the morning; and, in order to allow time for drying overnight, the ground floor tiles and lower stairs will be washed before I go to bed.  My mobile phone lies on the ledge behind the loo because that is the only place where I can sometimes receive a signal.  It beats a stack of joke books beside the seat.

Garden, Sigoules 2.13The last three weeks have been so wet that I haven’t been able thoroughly to sweep the tiles in the courtyard garden, although there was a brief window of warm sun this afternoon enabling me to sit outside for a while and even get a king sized duvet cover iron-dry.  The birds were joyful.  Maybe the chicken will finish the sweeping.

The usual excellent lunch in Le Code Bar was my last until my next trip.  When Fred offered me more delicious onion soup I resisted temptation on the grounds that ‘Max has scared me’.  Octopus rings in batter (how’s that Judith?) with a bowl of tomato sauce was to follow.  The main course was a beef stew containing numerous chunks of tender lean meat.  My response, when offered a second helping of that, was to decline, saying ‘Max would beat me’.  The sweet, described as ‘home-made cake’, had the consistency of a moist quiche and contained small pieces of pear.

After lunch I ironed the duvet cover and did some more washing, courtesy of Kim’s machine(see 31st July 2012).

Whilst I was in the bar posting this, Sofiene arrived.  He had, in passing, visited No.6 to find me not at home.  Knowing where to look, he found me.  He had brought me a present of a book of French poetry.  Naturally we had a drink together.

Around The House, Day 1

Upper staircase 2.13Today was what David has termed a ‘big clean’ day.  It is the mandatory preparation for the next visitors.  Washing and ironing is the least of it, because that has been done throughout my stay.

I work my way down from the top.  First the sweeping and hoovering, including the removal of any of last year’s lingering cobwebs.  Then the dusting, although there is very little of that.  Beds must be prepared, and the porcelain attended to.  The final task is swabbing down tiles and staircases.

When I have the luxury of more than one day I can be more thorough.  I first deal with those rooms I either have not used or will not be using again before I leave.

Attic room1, 2.13Attic room 2, 2.13Attic room 3, 2.13No-one this time has used the attic or bedroom 2 on the first floor.  They therefore didn’t need much attention.  Attic rooms 2 and 3 each lead off room 1.  What this room loses in privacy it gains in the presence of two spacious walk-in locked cupboards.  I think it was Elizabeth who pointed out that it would be possible to get two more bedrooms out of them.  The exposed original stone wall is interlaced with huge wooden beams from the dismantled barges that could only navigate one way up the Dordogne.  Just two entrance beams are a danger to heads.  These, as in the doorway of room 2, have warning flags pinned to them.  Otherwise a stepladder is required to reach the roof.  The chest of drawers in room 3 occupies a niche which  terminates below head height.

When Michael and Heidi  and their family first came here it took Oliver about thirty seconds to get up to the top and bag the bed in room 1.  The girls were quite happy with his choice, although Alice soon rigged up a truckle bed beside her brother.  The cupboard in room 3 had reminded her of a scary story.

Bedroom 2, 2.13After the attic came first floor bedroom 2 which, although large, needs a minimal amount of furniture as it has a built-in wardrobe.

I descended to the downstairs WC and shower-room and gave it a good once-over.Downstairs WC & shower room 2.13

Utility corridor 2.13Finally, I swept and swabbed down the upper staircase and the utility corridor leading to the shower room.  The only hazard in this area is the front wheel of Oliver’s outgrown mountain bike that hangs from the ceiling.

This was all done by 2.45 when I microwaved the rest of last week’s sausage casserole which I had removed from the freezer yesterday.  It was so delicious I finished the sauce with a spoon.  Does anyone else with a beard have trouble keeping soup out of it?