We’ve Been Badgered

A few days ago Jackie photographed these 40 Nicotiana Sylvestris seedlings sprouting in the greenhouse. When they are big enough she will transfer them to their beds.

Two evenings ago she leapt from the sofa exclaiming “What was that? –

It was a big thing”.

“A Touch of Frost” had to be put on hold while she rushed outside to investigate.

She followed a large creature as it slithered in a surprisingly agile manner underneath the metal gate on one side of the house.

It had also burrowed beneath the gate that Aaron had recently installed.

With an admirable turn of speed the Head Gardener gave chase and watched Β a badger rapidly run across Christchurch Road towards the field opposite.

This morning we received evidence of a further visit. Trenches had been scoured all round the garden shed.

Planted pots had been toppled and pebbles scooped out. Clearly our visitor had returned.

Research reveals that Brock is a member of a protected species and almost impossible to remove. One suggested deterrent is human urine, so I guess I will have to make a convenience of it.

Courtesy of those the lockdown prevented from visiting us at Easter, we had plenty of fresh from the freezer prawn melange ingredients to enjoy a repeat for dinner this evening; Jackie drank Budweiser and I finished the Barbera.


  1. Could you pour a concrete strip under the door so he couldn’t dig under? Or pound stakes down into the ground deep enough so he couldn’t? Or is that impossible? At the very least, an excellent excuse to drink lots of wine with your evening meal!!!

  2. If the gate is his only means of ingress to your property, I guess that is where to pour the concrete and pound the stakes. Is this the first time you’ve had this problem? Or that he’s had the problem with you locking him out from his playground/restaurant? What did he eat?

    1. We think we did have one at the far end of the garden a year or two back. Apparently they like earthworms, and peanuts in bird feeders. Thanks very much, Judy.

  3. Do yourself a favour and read “The Cold Moons” by Aeron Clement. Sorry about the trail of destruction though!

  4. I had no idea they went into gardens, but I see above that they like the peanuts in your bird feeders. I guess it’s good you have a fence so no one will see you “making a convenience of it.” ?

  5. Goodness what a bold badger! My dad used to work for the badger trust and they were always quite timid to appear whilst we waited for hours in the local woodlands! I hope you’re able to deter him. ? ?

  6. Oh no! Bad badger! I’m so sorry. When I saw the photo on my feed I thought you’d had a storm. Derek has made a β€œconvenience” to keep raccoons away from our suet.

  7. Oh no!! (That’s more in response to the thought of Derrick having to nip outside on a regular basis….) I once had a badger make a suicide run at my car one night as I returned home over The Downs. Being from the Antipodes and knowing no better, I stopped and gave chase in the hopes of finding him and saving a life. I hunted about in the undergrowth for ages and found nothing. I was told the next day by several alarmed people to never approach a hurt or cornered badger and ever since then I’ve had a respectful fear of them. Jackie was either very brave or very annoyed at his temerity!

  8. Putting the heading and first photo together I thought you were going to say he ate the seedlings. Why don’t you leave out a packet of peanuts for him on the other side of the gate and save him the trouble of burrowing. That will save you from a peeing perambulation? My auntie used to have a wombat wobble through her daffodil bed on his shortcut each night. Sent her into despair .

  9. HA! Great title! πŸ˜›
    Brock Badger must want to be adopted by you two! πŸ˜‰ πŸ˜€
    Now you need to make sure HE is peed off and won’t want to return!
    Tired of pee jokes and puns?!? Well, urine luck! I don’ t know any more off the top of my head…but I do know a badger joke…
    Why did the badger cross the road?
    It was the chicken’s day off.
    (((HUGS))) πŸ™‚
    PS…saw on the news about a couple who left their back door open and later realized there was something in their couch…it was a small racoon! They scooted him back out the door! πŸ™‚

  10. Well, maybe you should put the peanuts outside the gate. In a dish. They are smart and fierce. I’m sorry about all the rummaging and damage, though.

  11. Looks like the badger had a good time. I wonder if human urine would work for squirrels. I have all kinds of flags, trinkets, and windchimes around my strawberries which usually get consumed before I can pick them.

  12. That is monstrous, Derrick! I am in full concurrence with you about marking your territory with the weapon Nature has blessed you with!

  13. We have so many creatures at The Holler,
    doing what they like with us.
    Now, I am feeling sorta sad we don’t have a badger,
    unless of course it got into my vegetable garden, roses, sweet peas,
    or all the other Hollerific blooming plants.
    Still, a badger would be a sight I would like to see!

  14. No jokes. I don’t think any of it is all that funny. I can fully understand how angry the gardener would feel. I remember the day a fox dug into my fowl house and killed every one of them.

  15. I’ve only seen a badger once, it was going round and around in little circles in the middle of the side field. It did this for about ten minutes and then headed off into the woodland.

    I heard that urine around a perimeter fence deters foxes too.
    Now that the squirrels are back in my garden the bird nuts need topping up almost every day, I’m beginning to see why someone went on a shooting spree in the autumn. I might do some research on how to deter them. Hope it’s not urine, on the other hand I’m sure the idea would appeal the teenage grandson!

  16. There are quite a few farms in Cornwall now who have a business on the side showing badgers to tourists from the city. You sit in a hide and the farmer puts peanuts in a big bowl and scrapes peanut butter along the bark of the trees. Half an hour later, every badger for miles around has arrived.
    Perhaps you should take in your peanut feeder for the foreseeable future ? Peanuts are dangerous for baby birds anyway, and are supposed to choke them, although I personally am not 100% sold on that as an idea.

  17. My mum had a badger visit her garden. She did all sorts to try and deter it but she never managed to stop it. They are stubborn about their trails strong animals who can move heavy objects put in their way and if they can’t they just dig their way underneath.

  18. What disruption the critter has caused. Our critter of concern at home right now is a skunk. It’s in the neighborhood and you can smell it in the evening a lot. Hopefully the dogs do not find it.

  19. No badgers here, but there is a possum that visits the bird feeders at night. They’re ugly critters, with enormous appetites, but not destructive. Mine has reduced her (?) consumption and now cleans out only one feeder, so I’m letting her go on, thinking that she might have babies somewhere.

  20. On a smaller scale, it’s something like having a bear in your garden. However, no talk of trapping the bear and moving it to another location. πŸ˜‰ I, too, enjoyed the pee jokes. Too much self-isolation?

  21. Oh no, what a naughty badger making a mess of things! I do hope you’re able to deter it. I’ve been out trying to stop the squirrels from bothering my bird feeders, by oiling the pole. I sat out there for quite a while the other day waiting for one of them to come back and try to climb up after oiling it (would have been a funny sight), but they never came back. Little stinkers!

  22. Oh no, terrible about the destruction.
    Hopefully that intruder goes away, your garden so lovely.
    I hope you and Jackie have a great weekend.

  23. Gosh, what little devils. When we hear a bang in the night it’s usually because a possum has launched itself off the house roof and made a safe landing on the garden shed roof.

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