My mother died peacefully early this morning. Her last words to my sister Elizabeth last night were “I have had enough”. Most of us have had opportunities in the last couple of days to say goodbye.
I have spent the day with Elizabeth at Woodpeckers and at Diamond Undertakers in Lymington; and making a number of necessary telephone calls.
Jacqueline is now on her way to our house where we will all enjoy Jackie’s chicken jalfrezi and continue discussing decisions.
Oh, Derrick, I am so sorry! Here is a big hug for you my friend. 😭✝️🙏🏻
Thank you very much, John
So sorry to hear this not unexpected news. Sympathy and supportive thoughts winging their way to you from France. I’m sure you’ll arrange a wonderful send-off which will celebrate her life, longevity and loved ones.
Thank you so much, Sheree
So sorry to hear about your Mum. Not unexpected and still sad. When my father died in 2015, we knew he had been ready for about a year. Not that he ever said do.
Thank you very much, Pat. I think Mum was ready when she began resisting fluids. XX
A life well lived and many memories to treasure. All of you take care.
Thank you so much, Anne XX
Oh, Derrick! I am so sorry! She is now in the heavens. We will all meet there eventually. God rest her soul. Amen!
Thank you very much, Sofia XX
When the elderly die, they often say that they have had enough. My parents died against their will.
My condolences, Michel
Thank you very much, Micheline X
My thoughts are with you, Derrick. It is time to celebrate her long life well-lived. I did for my mother long ago.
Thank you very much, Byung X
Holding you and yours in my heart, Derrick. May this poem by Mary Elizabeth Frye, (1905-2004) be of some comfort:
Do not stand at my grave and weep,
I am not there – I do not sleep.
I am the thousand winds that blow,
I am the diamond glints in snow,
I am the sunlight on ripened grain,
I am the gentle autumn rain.
As you awake with morning’s hush
I am the swift-up-lifting rush
Of quiet birds in circling flight.
Do not stand at my grave and cry,
I am not there – I did not die.
A fine poem, Donna. Thank you very much
On a blogging break but had to read this post. Brought tears to my eyes. Through your posts, I have come to know and admire your mother. Whenever I feel overwhelmed by my work, I think of her and all that she had to do to take care of the family. A remarkable woman from a remarkable generation. A privilege to get to know her through you. So very sorry for your loss.
<3
Thank you very much, Laurie. Really appreciated XX
Oh poo… I hope the consolation of a long life well lived helps fill the inevitable hole…
Thanks very much, Geoff
I’m so sorry to hear this, Derrick. Thank you for sharing pieces of your sweet mother with us over the years. My prayers are with you and your family. xo
Thank you very much, Jill
Derrick, I’m happy to have gotten to know your mother. May she rest in peace. May you and your family find strength in each other during your shared loss and grief <3
Thank you very much, Rosaliene XX
I’m so sorry for your loss, Derrick. My thoughts are with you and your family.
Thank you very much, Liz XX
You’re welcome, Derrick.
I’m so sorry, Derrick. The next few days will be difficult, but you will soon take solace in the memories of a wonderful woman! My thoughts are with you!
Thank you very much, Janet XX
Oh, Derrick, I’m so sorry. I know she was much beloved and I’m sure she knew it, too. I’ll be thinking of you all in the upcoming days. Take care of yourself – drink plenty of water. <3
Thank you so very much, Jodie XX
<3
Derrick, please accept my sincere condolences on the passing of your beloved Mum.
It was especially moving when you posted pictures of her when you and Jacquie went to visit her, and also when she came to your garden.
It is beautiful to have witnessed your loving care for your mother. 🌼🌷
Thank you very much, Sally XX
Derrick–I’m so very sorry for your loss. I’m glad that you and your family had a chance to say goodbye to her. My thoughts are with you. 💙
Thank you so much, Merril XX
Derrick, Sher and I grieve with you and keep you, Jackie and your family in our prayers.
Thank you so much, Maj
So sorry to hear this Derrick. I’m glad you have Jackie’s (legendary) Jalfrezi to console you.
All the best, Alex
Thank you so much, Alex XX
So sorry for your loss Derrick. Sending lots of love. RIP Mary ❤
Thanks very much, John
More than welcome Derrick. So sorry mate.
I am so sorry for your loss, and that of your wonderful family: such a credit to your wonderful mother.
It has been truly warming to have met your mother, both through posts of your recent happy times together, and of your childhood. She was so clearly such a formidable, individual lady.
I wish you each all the strength you need to cope with this time. It is a time that we must all so dread. xx.
Thank you so much, Emma. Dread – and yet welcome at the end, because the time was right. XX
Yes. That and the fact that she knew how much she was loved is something to hold onto. Sending all best wishes to you both xx.
I am so sorry for your loss.
Thank you very much, GP X
I am so very sorry.
Heartfelt condolences.
Rest peacefully Derrick’s Mum.
x 🌹 x
Thank you very much, Melanie XX
x 💕 x
Healing hugs to you and your kin, in this time.
Thank you very much, Catherine X
I’m so glad you shared your Mum with us, Derrick. I came to enjoy her ‘visits’ to your blog, just as I know she enjoyed every minute with you and Jackie. While this isn’t unexpected, it’s saddened me. I know you’ll miss her, but you did everything a son (and a family) could do to make her latter years more of a pleasure and less of a burden for her.
Everyone has said everything that can be said. I wish I could give you a big hug. And to look in your eyes because everything I’d have to say would be there as it would for you. Please know I think of you daily as it is, and now especially. I’m glad your mum lived a long life with such love and good people in her life, I’m glad you had your mum as long as you did, and I see such love in you and your family. At the same time my heart hurts for you and I am sending you all of my love. You are a beautiful soul and you make me feel so lucky to know you. Bless your mum.
Thank you so very much, Candy XX
I don’t know if you saw my poem for your mum but I’m copying it here just incase. I think I may have inadvertantly posted it on the other site – my WP site.
With iridescent sun and Busy Lizzie’s, the day
curtsied bonne nuit
as shyly as a virgin
as boldly as a lover
as robust as an old woman
laughing from the pit of her well-lived stomach
vein-laced hand flung back in half-made-gesture
the opacity of her skin belying
the depths of her eternal sea green eyes
(For Derrick)
I had not seen it, Candy. Thank you so very much again. With much love, XX
I’m glad I thought to send it this way as I wasn’t sure if you had seen it, I wrote it the day afterward. Sending you much love. Thinking of you.
Thank you so much, Candy, Likewise. X
So sorry to hear about it Derrick. Condolence to the whole family. May her soul rest in eternal peace.
Thank you very much, Arlene X
My condolences to you, Derrick, and to all your family.
Thank you very much, Roland
We are so sorry for your loss and sending our love and best wishes to you all. Ann and Michael x
Thank you both very much, Ann and Michael X
I am sorry for your loss . In time i hope your memories are of the happiest times with this person .
Thank you very much, Graham
I’m so very sorry for your loss <3 Prayers to you, your family, your friends and all loved ones.
Thank you so much, M.B. X
I am so very sorry to hear about your beautiful Mum’s death. 🙁
You, Jackie, and all of your family will be in my thoughts, condolences, and prayers.
I’m so glad she lived a long life and was loved dearly. I will miss her here on your blog in the months and years ahead. 🙁
(((HUGS))) <3
“Those we love never truly leave us. There are things that death cannot touch.” – Jack Thorne
Thank you very much, Carolyn. XXX
My deepest condolences. Glad you were ale to say your goodbyes.
Thank you so much, Peggy X
I’m glad that I picked up on this post Derrick. My deepest condolences to you and your family on the loss of your mother. She came across as a wonderful, resilient lady and it would seem it was the right time for her to go. I’m sure you will have much to remember and rejoice over as you talk with your family. Take good care of yourself in the coming days.
Thank you so much, Sandra. Yes – it was time – the toughest part was watching people trying to get liquid sustenance into her. X
Once again I offer my sympathies to you.
You have experienced heart breaking loss so many times Derrick, and by now you must be an expert on all the legal procedures we must all endure.
From your writings I know your mother was a strong and wonderful lady, and I’m sure you must feel very proud to be her son.
Love to you all.
Thank you so much, Sue. Experience does tell me we get through it. XX
Yes, you’ll laugh, you’ll cry and you’ll remember her with love.
Thank you for sharing her with us. xx
I’m so sorry to hear of your sad loss, but she died peacefully, and that is a blessing.
Thank you very much, John.
May the Lord be with you all as you meet, enjoy good food and share fond memories.
Thank you so much, Chrissy XX
I am so sorry for your loss. No matter how well we prepare for it, the loss of a mother is devastating.
Thank you very much, Midnight X
Thoughts, prayers and much love are with you and your family, Derrick. I got to know your mother through your blog and feel as if I have lost one of my own. I admired her spirit and positive outlook. She was a dear lady.
Thank you very much, Lavinia XX
My condolences Derrick. Peacefully is a good thing. And I know, by experience that our elders sometimes feel they have had enough. So peace is to be desired. Now the sadness falls upon the living. For a time. Then we can remember them with a smile. How long does it take? Who knows. My best wishes to you and your family.
Wise words, Brian. Thank you very much
Derrick, I offer my heartfelt condolences yo you and your family. Having lost my mom a number of years ago, I was always touched by your stories of visiting your mom. You have wonderful pictures that will bring joy to your heart and out smiles on your face when you review them from time to time. God bless you, Derrick, and may your mom Rest In Peace.
Thank you so much, Steve X
My sincere condolences to you, Jackie, and to “all” the families … her time here was precious, time catches us all …
Yes, Ivor, and it was definitely time. Thanks you very much X
Hugs and condolences on the loss of your mother. Having been in a situation where I was near death, I know your body tells you when it’s time, so let it happen. It was a pleasant sensation that passed (fortunately for me), and it helped me to accept the inevitable without fear. I hope she was free of pain, and comforted by all of you coming to see her one last time.
Thank you so much for these wise and sensitive words, Doug.
I hope they were comforting at this sad time in your family, Derrick.
They were.
This is never easy even when you are expecting it. Thinking of you and yours during this difficult time, Derrick.
Thank you so much, Becky X
I’m so very sorry, Derrick. Your mum had a wonderful life, and I’m thankful she was able to be with her family and could share ther thoughts to the end. Prayers for peace on the way!
Thank you so much, JoAnna X
We are blessed with wonderful memories of your Mum and an insight it to her resilience, resourcefulness, and the all encompassing love in which she embraced and enveloped you all. The last post featured her playfully at the lunch table. Her words were apt then, as they are now. You will always be comforted in the knowledge she slipped away peacefully. Sending you strength and compassion in these coming days.
Thank you you so very much, Gwen XX
I’m very sorry for your loss, Derrick. I enjoyed your posts about your mother. I’m glad you and family members had the opportunity to say goodbye. Sending my sympathy.
Thank you so much, Barbara X
I’m sorry Derrick for your loss. I pray God comforts your hearts and that he is with you and your family.
Thank you so much, More X
You’re very welcome
I’m so sorry for your loss. 🙏💗
Thank you very much, Laura X
Blessings to you Derrick, and may your mother’s soul rest eternally in peace. Her son’s love has certainly shown through on your many posts and moments of caring and loving her with your wife. Your friend, Susan in Arizona
Thank you so much, Susan
I am deeply sorry for your loss, my friend. The parting words of your Mother say it all, however. May she rest in peace.
Thank you so much, Uma. Given that it is just a month since she last visited us I am pleased that the last stage was so short.
Indeed. That is a blessing.
I’m so sorry, Derrick. It was time, I suppose. But I have really enjoyed all the photos you posted, she always looked so happy. She had such a warm smile. May you always remember her. Much love.
Thank you so much, Marina. X
Thank you for introducing us to your lovely mother. My love to you and all those who knew and loved her.
Thank you very much, Yvonne
Bon Voyage, Derrick’s Mum, and a hug for her son, from Canada.
Thank you very much, Widders XX
Very sad to read this. Accept my heartfelt condolences, Derrick.
Thank you very much, Rupali X
My sincere condolences!
Thank you very much, Alexander
my heart is with you and yours. Your Mother’s words were similar to my Mom’s when she passed. I so totally get it. Oyashikiri – Peace!
Thank you so much, Q XX
My heart goes out to you and the family Derrick. Such a sad and difficult time. May you find peace with loved ones and the memories to treasure always. Sending a hug and raising a glass along with you to a life well lived, and an ending on her own terms. xoxo
Thank you very much, Val XX
Please accept our condolences. I am so glad she went peacefully.
Thank you very much, Lakshmi X
I am sorry for your loss. You are in my thoughts and prayers.
Thank you very much, Mrs W
Your welcome.
After a long life well lived it’s still incredibly sad when the inevitable happens. Sending you thoughts and best wishes, Derrick.
My deepest sympathies, Derrick. I am so sorry for your loss. I am happy to hear that your Mum was obviously ready to go. From what I have seen of your posts, she lived a good life and passed with peace and dignity. Love to you and Jackie and all of your family 💞.
Thank you so much, AnneMarie XX
Oh no, I’m really sorry to read this friends. Arms around you, take good card xK
Thank you so much, Kelly X
I’m so very sorry to hear this. Your mother always put a smile on my face. My thoughts are with you and your family.
Thank you very much, Leslie XX
Sending condolences to you and your family. Your mum had a long life and great care too. I’m sure you’ll miss going to see her at Woodpecker’s. So glad you were all able to spend some time with her. Hugs to you, Derrick.
Thank you so much, Sylvia X
I had a hunch based on yesterday’s blog that your mum may have been having that rally that often happens before leaving this earth…. sort of our loved ones’ gift to us that we get to see them in better spirits a day or two before their transition. So glad your sis was there with her and her passing seemed to be a peaceful one. She let you know she was ready. Still, there is a hole in your heart – I know that feeling. It is one that only time can heal. May the love of family and friends and the joy of happy memories bring you peace and comfort, (((Derrick))) – I send my love and virtual hugs. <3
Thank you very much, Jan. You are right. That was exactly my response to the rallying, although I didn’t disillusion anyone. X
Wise to keep it to yourself. You’re right – no one needed to be disillusioned! Bless you, my friend. I hope your memories are sweet ones and bring a smile whenever your mum comes to mind. <3
Thank you once more, Jan X
My deepest sympathy to you and your family, Derrick. Sending warm thoughts from Australia.
Thank you very much, Jane X
Please accept my deepest condolences, Derrick.
Thank you so much, Dolly X
You are very welcome, Derrick.
I like those words, but hard for those left behind. My thoughts are with your family
Thank you very much, Sylvie. I think that is why she had been resisting liquids
Oh! How sad
Thanks again
I am deeply sorry for your loss Derrick. My thoughts are with you and all your family.
Thank you very much, Takami
I’m so sorry for the loss of your mother 🤍.
Thank you very much, Mrs Gumboots
Sorry Derrick, I’m just catching up. Sorry to hear about your mother. I always enjoyed her appearances in your blog.
Thank you so much, Quercus. I know you have had a recent similar experience.
my deepest condolences to you and your family, Derrick. her last words says it all. i am glad you spent a lovely time with her recently. hugs to you.
Thank you so much, Lola X
So sorry for your loss, Derrick. Condolences to you and your family.
Thank you very much, Joycee
My mother died peacefully a few years ago and it seemed quite unreal and my emotions weren’t real until some time after. My thoughts are with you Derrick. May they be full of warm memories and joyful times.
Thank you so much, John
My condolences Derrick, I feel that I almost knew your mother through your blog posts.
So sad to read this and I am extremely sorry for your loss Derrick. Perhaps you will find comfort in the fact that you were able to see her several times despite covid. My deepest condolences to you and your family and I hope you are able to overcome your grief
Thank you so much, Geetha X
<3
Derrick. I did not know (in response to y our comment on my own post yesterday…). My truest sympathy….I thought she ight be soon leaving, but so sorry I missed your post about her death. Across the sea, a warm hug.
Thank you very much, Cynthia. No problem. I thought you must have missed it. XX You probably know I never just “like” without reading. 🙂
All good, and glad of the reading before “liking”, indeed.
I’m very sorry Derrick! My sincere condolences to you and entire family! I guess the most important is that she went peacefully!
Thank you very much, Ribana X
I’m glad that your mother died peacefully, Derrick, and that she and you had the opportunity to see each other and say goodbye.
Thank you very much, Helen
😊
So sorry to read of your mother’s passing Derrick. Our thoughts are with you all.
Thank you very much, Lindsey
I’m sad to see that your mum is gone. What a great smile she had. I hope writing and sharing her life gives you much comfort.
Thank you very much, Rose. Yes – it is helping.
You’re welcome. You make WordPress really great
Thanks again
I am so sorry, Derrick. My condolences to you and your family on losing such an important member of your family. I am glad she died peacefully.
Thank you so much, Clare
I am deeply sorry for your loss, my friend. Cherish the memories, and plant something she loved in your garden to honor and remember hey by.
Thank you so much, msw
I am sorry to find out that your dear mother has died. She lived through some remarkable times, as your tales show, and leaves behind a family she must have been so very proud of. I’m sending my sympathy to you all. It’s a blessing to know it was peaceful and to hear of her last words to Elizabeth.
Thank you so very much, Susan X
I am so sorry to read about your mom’s passing. My thoughts are with your family.
Thank you very much, Bridget
Sorry for your loss Derrick, I’m sure she lived a full life and was ready to move on.
Leslie
Yes. Thanks very much, Leslie