Ella Does Byron Road

With Ella visiting this afternoon it was incumbent on us to put up the Christmas tree before she arrived. I thought we might have done it;

but the Maintenance Department informed me that this was just a start.

After lunch I posted https://derrickjknight.com/2021/12/18/a-knights-tale-79-wedding-number-three/

Danni, Andy, Ella, and Jack, shortly followed by Elizabeth visited this afternoon. We spent a pleasant hour and a half together until it grew dark enough for us to visit the Byron Road Christmas lights, leaving Jackie at home until we returned and enjoyed the Culinary Queen’s tasty cottage pie; firm Brussels sprouts, cauliflower, carrots and broccoli; tender runner beans; and additional creamy mashed potatoes, with meaty supplementary gravy.

When the family arrived it was easy enough to plonk Jack, knowing that at 6 weeks he wasn’t likely to roll off sofa or cushions.

Ella, on the other hand was soon dragging her father into the library for the toy hamper to be brought into the sitting room.

Jackie took a hand at feeding our great-nephew,

until handing him back to his mother when the young family shared the sofa for a while.

On the Chesterfield Jackie read to Ella, until the sun had gone to bed and the rest of us set off to enjoy

the artificial light sources at Byron Road. Danni, Andy, Ella, Jack, and Elizabeth are all featured in the scenes, and named in their gallery images.

Later we dined as mentioned above, with Hoegaarden for Jackie, the last of the Pomerol for me, The Second Fleet Clare Valley Merlot 2020 for Elizabeth and Danni, and Diet Coke for Andy.

A Knight’s Tale (79: Wedding Number Three)

Eight years after our separation and one year after the divorce, Jackie and I each married someone else.

Here, Jessica prepares to leave Horse and Dolphin Yard on the brief journey to Marylebone Registry Office for our legal coupling on 1st March 1980. It is most likely Matthew who photographed us with Carole and the top of Becky’s head, after I had helped him fix a problem with his camera.

Afterwards we returned to our flat where I photographed the third Mrs Knight festooned with flowers; and in the evening repaired to a wine bar in Leicester Square, the name of which I have forgotten.

Matthew definitely provided pictures of the toast. Becky, Michael, Carole, and Simon make up the small gathering.

A Flaw In The Printing

This morning I completed the addressing of the last of the cards for posting.

After lunch I scanned the next six of Charles Keeping’s marvellous illustrations to my Folio Society edition of ‘Dombey and Son’.

‘He caught her to his heart’

‘ ‘I beg your pardon, ‘ interposes Cousin Feenix’

‘ ‘Let go, will you? What are you doing of?’ ‘

‘She wound her wild black hair around her hand’

The drawing of ‘She surveyed him with a haughty contempt and disgust’, shows the gentleman’s unusually sheathed teeth indicating his discomfort;

and, in the foreground of ‘Away, at a gallop, over the black landscape’ the teeth display alarm instead of the usual broad grin.

Because of a flaw in the printing of this page, I have not included the text with the image which is too good to omit.

Max, of Peacock Computers, visited this afternoon to troubleshoot the new landline, and to tidy up the cable spaghetti of the improved broadband system.

Afterwards we posted the cards and bought bread and tomatoes at Everton Post Office.

This evening we dined on Jackie’s substantial chicken and vegetable stewp and fresh crusty bread and butter, with which she drank Hoegaarden and I drank more of the Pomerol.

Pool Patterns

Straight after lunch on another dimly lit unseasonably warm day we revisited

a largely lifeless Lyndhurst High Street where we shopped once more in Down to the Wood and this time in the Antiques Centre; and Jackie managed to resist entering Tasty Pastries.

On our return through Boldrewood one of the pottering ponies produced pool patterns blended with knobbly branches.

Enticed by a pink streak slashing the distant sky we diverted to Barton on Sea for a look at it.

This evening we dined on slow roasted boned and rolled breast of lamb; small new boiled potatoes, crunchy carrots, cauliflower and broccoli; and tender runner beans, with which I drank more of the Pomerol while Jackie abstained.

Loyal Greetings

Today Jackie wrapped Christmas presents and posted the first batch of cards I had written out.

For all my readers here is the sole surviving printed one I made 64 years earlier;

and the original produced on white scraper board.

This evening Jackie dined on the last of the pasta arrabbiata with half a glass of Hoegaarden, and I finished the lamb jalfrezi and pilau rice accompanied by Chateau Montviel Pomerol 2016.

Window Shopping

This morning I posted https://derrickjknight.com/2021/12/14/a-knights-tale-77-1-experiential-groups/

After lunch on this gloomy, yet warm, day we drove to Lyndhurst for some Christmas shopping. The High Street was so unpopulated that it was only

when I wished to include visitors in photographs that I could do so,

leaving shop windows to my lens.

The Stag’s electronic Santa was not a real person.

Jackie was real, but I also focussed on her. In the second picture she is aiming for the Camping shop, where we made a purchase; and who did we see when we emerged into the street but

Danni and Ella – and “Where’s Jackie” (11) – and Jack in their car.

Alongside Rodlease Lane on our return home stood a pair of inquisitive field horses.

This evening we dined on more of Jackie’s jalfrezi and pilau rice with which she drank Hoegaarden and I finished the Malbec.

A Knight’s Tale (77.1: Experiential Groups)

Dolly’s comment on https://derrickjknight.com/2021/12/11/a-knights-tale-77-as-long-as-i-can-have-that-one/ has prompted me to offer something about my experience of groups.

First I must say that I believe that where we come in our families is a fundamental cause of how we behave in such similar bodies; thus, as the eldest of five siblings it has been natural for me to adopt the leadership roles with which life has presented me.

The idea of experiential groups is that the facilitator does not take a leadership role, but listens and observes, in order to give members the opportunity, by participating, to understand what is happening. Whilst I was training I learned my natural position from my relationship with the then facilitator. We of course expected her to take a lead. She didn’t. I challenged her to respond. She remained silent. I don’t remember clearly what followed, but I took on the job of urging the other members to work out how we were going to function. Not only was I leading, but I was satisfying the group’s need for leadership.

Another principle of group work is known as pairing. This is when two members thrash something out while the others watch to see what happens. I think that is what Wolf and I were doing when, in a seminar, we got into a twenty minute argument about whether we were to be the newly conceived Social Workers or the Child Care Officers we had been before the course began.

My readers are already aware of some of the professional management and chairing roles I have undertaken. More will follow in due course.

I have twice undertaken jury service, each time in a different part of London and some years apart. On the first occasion, when younger, and not having learned what I have spoken about above, I was an active participating member, who had some sway on others, but I had no official leadership role.

The way the service works is that we are expected to elect the foreman immediately, without discussion. If, as this time, the cases are all short term, the membership of each changing group will include some who have served on earlier cases, with some who haven’t yet played a part. On the second occasion I was elected five times out of six.

I formed the opinion that the outcome of a case was more about group dynamics than about justice. For example when the pairing mentioned above occurred I was able to intervene by challenging each debater to explain why he or she took such a stance. One gentleman who patently was not prepared to find anyone guilty, told us that his son was due to face a charge the following week.

One of our cases involved a young man who had been arrested on a pretext by a group of police who had been drinking out of hours. He was then charged with stealing something from one officer’s car. It was so patently obvious that the police were lying that a concerned inspector appeared in the visitor’s gallery in the afternoon. We walked into the jury room to debate our decision. There was a bell for us to communicate this. Without giving anyone time to sit down I simply asked if we were all agreed. With no discussion, everyone said “yes”. I pressed the bell. We returned to the courtroom and I delivered a not guilty verdict.

This made me feel guilty about a previous verdict in a case where the key witness was one of those in this one and we had, perhaps naively, believed him and delivered a verdict of guilt.

Catering For Boxing Day

On the only dry morning of a largely dreary day we visited Tesco for Jackie to obtain further ingredients for her Boxing Day curries, and to acquire petrol.

Having now read fifty more pages of ‘Dombey and Son’ I scanned the next nine of Charles Keeping’s exquisitely detailed illustrations to my Folio Society edition.

‘Painted and patched for the sun to mock’

In ‘The horse, in his struggles to get up, kicked him’ features the artist’s trademark dog, with Keeping’s own imagination demonstrating the animal’s distress at the accident.

‘Awake, doomed man, while she is near’

‘Mr Dombey, in a paroxysm of rage, pulled his hair rather than nothing’

‘She confronted him with the same self-possession and steadiness’

‘ ‘Don’t mind her,’ she said; ‘she’s a strange creetur’

‘She cast the gems upon the ground’

‘The captain carried her up’. Note how the stairs are indicated.

Of all the delicate details in ‘She dared not look into the glass’ perhaps the mirror is the cleverest.

Later, I published https://derrickjknight.com/2021/12/13/a-knights-tale-78-divorce/

The Culinary Queen perfected her Boxing Day Chicken Jalfrezi during the day,

saving enough of the sauce prepared yesterday to see us through the week on lamb jalfrezi and pilau rice, which we began this evening with her favourite Hoegaarden and more of the Malbec for me.

A Knight’s Tale (78: Divorce)

During the 1970s, Jessica’s former in-laws part owned Robin Ghyll, a farmhouse in Ambleside within sight of

the Langdale Pikes in the Lake District, where we enjoyed a number of holidays with Sue and her children.

Jessica, Becky, and Piper enjoyed splashing about in the tarns. Rock pools provided fun for both Becky, Matthew, and the other children. The above images are all from August 1975.

Four years later, while on another holiday there with friends and my nephew James, I received the date of Jackie and my divorce hearing in London. This meant a return train journey which felt like the longest of my life. Jessica volunteered to accompany me, but this was an ordeal that I wished to undergo alone. I would not contest custody, so the hearing was short and definitely neither sweet nor savoury.

Dreaming Of Christmas Dinner

Today Jackie filled the house with the aroma of her delicious jalfrezi sauce for the curry option of her Boxing Day culinary delights.

Taking a break after lunch on this mild, cloudy day occasionally graced with a peek of sunshine, she drove me into the forest.

Father Christmas once again toasts his toes on the Lymington River Christmas float, while gulls fly over moored boats.

Stopping at Shotts Lane to photograph skies and trees, we watched a raptor tracking potential prey, perhaps dreaming of its Christmas dinner.

Through holes in hedges along Lisle Court Lane we glimpsed the masts of Lymington Harbour.

The tree on the Portmore village green now sports its Christmas baubles;

someone must have dropped a jigsaw puzzle piece outside the telephone box converted to a book exchange. Although it did not belong to the puzzle inside the booth, I picked it up and placed it on top of the similar attraction, where at least it would have a chance to dry out.

A horse peered over a gate on Jordans Lane while another forever followed a pointer across a weather vane.

The crochet artist shy of publicity has now given us a Christmas mice theme atop the Pilley Hill letter collection box.

This evening we dined on Jackie’s tangy pasta arrabbiata and fresh green beans, with which she drank Hoegaarden and I drank Cahors Malbec 2019.